A Beacon Potager: March 2013

Aesthetically, the worst thing about this house - hands-down - are the radiator covers. And there are about a dozen of them. They were poorly constructed, utilized cheap particle board screens, and the top boards were covered in shag carpet that was crudely cut, wrestled in place and stapled on. Usually right on top of an even older piece of carpet.

And they stink to high heaven. They've obviously never been cleaned. There is probably 40+ years of dust, dirt and God knows what else snuggled in between each and every one of those petroleum-based strands.

This is the best example. And by best, I mean the nicest, classiest-looking one in the house:

There are no holes in the screen! It's (sort of) one color!

Can you smell that? Sort of a musty grandma smell? Yeah.

This is my favorite project when I am feeling overwhelmed by all of the other larger, more time-consuming projects. With this project I get to do many different, small tasks, which I find to be less tedious than say, stripping paint off of baseboards for hours on end. This is a "quick win" to borrow the lingo of those who work in the world of finance. It just takes a day or so, it's fairly inexpensive, and the results are pretty remarkable. Plus, to buy a new one is insanely expensive.

All you need to buy is:

A metal radiator screen (about $20 for two radiators worth depending on the size of yours - my preference is the aluminum Union Jack pattern.)
A pre-cut, pre-sanded stainable white wood board with a butcher block pattern (about $9 at Lowes for a 3/4"x1'x3' piece)
Paint/tung oil
Finishing nails

The steps are numerous, but easy:

Cut the new top board to size and apply tung oil the night before if possible. It makes life much easier.
Give it another coat of tung oil first thing in the morning. Set aside.
Remove the old top board from base with crowbar posthaste. Don't even bother trying to pull that carpet to save the old top board. It's not worth it.
Flip the base on to sawhorses and pull all of the staples holding down the sheet with needlenose pliers. Remove sheet. Discard. Feel a sense of relief.
Take a scrub brush and soapy water to the years of grime, spiderwebs and whatnot that have accumulated on the base. Dry. Repeat if necessary
Use a nailset to "set" the nails that are holding the base together, if it hasn't been done already. (Note: it has never been done already.) "Setting" means to sink the nailhead below the surface of the wood.
Use wood filler to fill all of the little imperfections (like your set nail holes.)
Use DAP caulk to fill in the spaces where boards meet. It is much more forgiving. Let filler and caulk dry.
Sand filler spots, and give the whole piece a quick once over to allow the paint to hold better.
Use a tack cloth (or a damp rag) to go over the whole thing to remove any sanding dust.
Paint the exterior.
Use snips to cut your sheet insert to size, giving yourself overage of at least an inch on each side. WEAR GLOVES.
Once the new top board is dry, use a cabinet vice to hold it in place on top of the (now dry) base. Measure several times and adjust to make sure it's centered properly.
Use 1" finishing nails to attach it to the base. I use one on each corner. Hammer carefully, or you will have indentations on your new top board. Set nails.
Use a staple gun to attach the new sheet to the inside of the base.
Fill the set nail holes on the new top board.
Tung oil the top board until it is to your liking.